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Acting, Cows & Fear

I spent New Years Eve in a barn

A two-day-old orphaned calf wasn’t taking to the bottle

I was 90% sure we would lose him by sunrise 

So my mate and I spent the night taking turns sitting in the straw trying to coax the little guy to feed 

It was a quiet time to reflect on the past year

What were the best things about it, what I was ready for in 2022, etc etc.

Surprisingly 

During the night

Rufus began to suckle

And by the time morning arrived

He was guzzling down a litre at a time

It was pretty special to see the life come back into the small creature 

To watch him rise up on his gangly little legs and begin to bellow 

However

(And I won’t go into too much bovine husbandry detail here)

Due to Rufus’ lack of mommas milk within his first 6 hours of life

His body doesn’t have the greatest defence

Which means it could be a tough 6 months ahead 

There is a high probability he will get sick 

So he’s going to need a little extra care in kicking this year off

A little TLC when it comes to maintaining his health and building a stronger immune system

It’s just the way it is

Sure…

It feels a little frustrating

It feels a little unfair 

And there is a part of me which even feels a little afraid 

(plenty of “what if” thoughts popping up)

But facts are facts

So…

Time to grow

Fact: I don’t know how to raise an orphaned calf well

Here is a skillset which I would like to get better at

So I think it’s an important time for me to ask myself two questions

Firstly

Do I believe I can get better at this skill?

Secondly

How do I overcome the fear required for me to get better at this skill?

I love this second question…

Because it brings up a non-negotiable

In trying to improve myself at something

I will be stepping out of my comfort zone

And that means fear is guaranteed to raise its head 

(thank you brain & body for trying to keep me alive) 

There will be moments

Where despite my intentions, focus, tenacity, willingness 

I will feel afraid

And I will most likely have some thoughts, feelings and physiological reactions which make it uncomfortable for me to keep going

Making it easier for me to seek comfort and distract myself with pleasure rather than doing what will make me fall asleep with pride & gratitude

So the question then becomes…

If I want to be good at something which I believe is important,

How will I manage myself and my fears moving forward?

Curious

Here’s to 2022

& thank you for the reminder, Rufus

Past Year Review

An exercise I love doing around his time of year…

An adaptation of Tim Ferris’ Past Year Review

1. Five minutes - write down the most energising moments of 2021. (What experiences, moments, work, things, people, etc etc, gave you the most joy, excitement, fulfilment, love, etc etc)

2. One minute - circle the top 20%. (Example; if you had 20 things, what were the 4 that gave you the most energy?)

3. Five minutes - write down the most de-energising moments of 2021. (What experiences, moments, work, things, people , etc etc, were the most draining?)

4. One minute - circle the top 20%. (Example; if you had 20 options, what were the 4 that you found drained you the most?)

5. Now, taking these noticings into 2022, attempt to replace the de-energising with the energising (book it now, schedule it now, pay for it now)

Voila!

P.S.

The Luminaries is finally out in Australia 

The BBC six part mini series is based off the Man Booker Prize-winning novel by Eleanor Catton

You can find it on Paramount+

I had 6 days notice to prepare a Scottish accent and get from the desert in Utah, USA to Aukland, New Zealand

It was absolutely one of the funnest adventures I have had

Plus there was a large ensemble of wonderful actor’s to play with for those two months

Including Eva Green, Eve Hewson, and the insanely amazing Kieren Charnock 

Hope you enjoy x 

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